Awww...the luxury of Spring Break!

I must say...I think I'm beginning to love Spring Break more than any other break as a teacher, except for summer, of course. This past week has been wonderful. I feel like I have really spent some good time with old friends which reminds me of how thankful I should be right now on my journey with the Lord. I almost feel like I've been on a spiritual retreat. Let me just tell you what I've been up to since I left the wild side of Nashville.

After Nashville, I drove up to Louisville, Kentucky to stay with my dear friends Laura Wishall and Kathleen Hanley. This portion of my break was very laid back and very relaxing. I spent all morning on Tuesday with the Lord and I feel like I was able to really present a lot of crap that has been going on in my life for the past bit. It was freeing. I feel a little bit more confident in these hard areas than I did before my journey to Louisville.

I spent a lot of time with Laura and Kathleen, which was so encouraging to my heart. I think sometimes I get in these friendship ruts where I feel like I have to work hard at being accepted and loved. It was just SO good to be near friends who I know love me and who love me for just who I am. I wasn't trying to impress or prove myself worthy...I just was. And that was beautiful.

One of my favorite parts of my journey to Louisville was playing with Reas, Kathleen and Ryan's 11month old baby boy. He was so fun and so adorable. I really miss having babies in my life.

Spending time with Kathleen and Laura reminded me of who I really am inside. I've forgotten how much I treasure heart friends, quality time, and making memories. I'm so thankful for fun new memories such as: driving through humongous puddles with Laura, watching Steel Magnollias and bawling like babies, grading papers with great friends, and playing the coupon game with Laura.

On Thursday, I drove all the way home so that I could go to worship practice. Today I spent the day with my mom. I took her to lunch at a tea room, went shopping, and then went with her to the salon to get her nails done. Somehow on the journey from TJ Maxx to Gary's salon, mom talked me into getting not only a pedicure, but waxing my eyebrows as well! It was too fun and so worth it. I definitely have an appointment for next month...Wahoo for being a woman.
Well, that basically wraps up my Spring Break! Tomorrow I plan on spending my Saturday in my classroom, preparing and organizing for my little angels. All after sleeping in, of course!

Right now I am enjoying the thrills of Spring Break and getting away from my 23 hellions. I am sitting here in Nashville with my friend Casey and I just want to take a moment and share with you what I did last night after driving for 8 hours.

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  First I met Casey at the Opryland hotel and mall. I spent too much money on some new Shox and a cool hat for my brother from the Gibson store. I also took some amazing pictures of flowers and a fish that looked like it had tumors all over it.


• After Opryland, Casey and I ventured to the downtown area. We walked down by all the bars and I felt like a cool city girl. We wanted to go to the hockey game but tickets were $55 and I couldn't justify going after buying Shox.


• We ate dinner at the Wildhorse Saloon and then went line dancing. I felt so cool and for the first time regretted not owning cowboy boots. I had tennis shoes on and felt like a FREAK!


• After the saloon, Casey and I kept walking around the craziness of downtown Nashville. I enjoyed culture shock when I went into the Coyote Ugly bar. WOH!! I pretty much felt dirty as I watched the girls dancing on the bar. We were only in the bar for about ten minutes, but while we were there, a very drunk man came close to me and tried to grab me. Thank goodness, a huge bouncer was right behind me and saved me from the drunken old man. My favorite part of Coyote Ugly was when the girls on the bar asked for girls in the crowd to come on the bar. It just so happens that there was two lesbian couples in the crowd. I had actually seen them at the Saloon earlier. I remembered seeing them because they were one of those couples that one of them has to LOOK like a man. The girl in the man role had a close shaved mullet and a West Coast Choppers shirt...along with a can of Skoal in the back pocket. Well, when the lady bartenders asked for girls to come up, this Man-Woman got up on the bar. It was so funny seeing her up there because at first glance, you think she's a man. The men all looked very confused...and then disturbed. It was quite the ten minute experience.


• After Coyote Ugly, we walked around some more. I saw many homeless people, musicians playing for tips, and a man offering to take a picture with his monkey for $10. What a bargain. I then went into a souvenir shop and saw a Branson scrap book...random.


• After downtown, we drove by the Parthenon and Casey showed me Music Row, the area where all the major producing studios are located.

Well, that sums up my Saturday night in Nashville. Today we might go thrift store shopping, tour the Jack Daniels distillery, go watch a bluegrass jam session, and eat mighty fine Mexican food. Wahoo! Yeah for Spring Break!!

Grouchiness, Frustrations...and Insomnia

Have you ever been up too late and you want nothing more than to be in bed but there are so many thoughts and emotions running through your head that you know it would be pointless to even try to sleep? That seems to be where I am right now. It's almost midnight and I have to get up at five something...yet here I am, pouring my heart out in cyberspace.

I'm frustrated right now because I let myself get caught up in too much and allow myself to become grouchy. Is there ever a good reason to be grouchy? I think it's one thing to be grouchy inside and have a bad attitude, but it's totally another thing when you take all the frustrations and grouchiness and slam it on an unsuspecting victim. I would say in the classroom, this can happen a lot. One student makes a bad choice and everyone suffers. I feel bad for my students who can't read my mood and tell me their pencil broke when I'm about to explode.

I feel the worst about grouchiness when I take it out on my friends and don't allow myself to have a good time in a group setting. I hate it when people have a bad attitude yet I find myself doing the same thing. I was grouchy tonight in my smallgroup and I definitely took it out on certain friends. It's almost as if all my frustrations of the day and disappointments in certain students are stored up in me until just the right moment when I feel I have been wronged. And then...watch out! It all comes spilling towards whoever the unlucky person is.

Tonight in smallgroup, we talked about wisdom...where it comes from and how we can obtain it. I feel like I gain a lot of wisdom through experiences like these where I learn from my mistakes while at the same time learning how to be humble when it comes to apologizing and admitting that I indeed was at fault. Goodnight!

I Rejoice in Your Successes

So, the past few weeks teaching has been really hard. I've been discouraged and just really doubted my capabilities as a teacher. I've been amazed this year how much what goes on in my classroom affects my real life...spiritually, physically, and emotionally. I have a few boys that are very hard to work with. One is very apathetic, flippant and doesn't care about ANYTHING. I have another kid who tries so hard but when he doesn't understand or succeed at first, he throws a huge fit and cusses up a storm. These two boys have been my challenge for the year. I have 23 other challenging children, but these two boys are the ones who hold my attention and ultimately hold my heart. I've come to realize these past few weeks that when I notice they are doing something good, when they are trying, or when they get above a C on a paper or homework assignment, a breeze of true joy washes over me. For a brief moment, it is all worth the hardships I am facing. It is only a brief moment, but during that moment the phrase "I rejoice in your successes" keeps repeating in my head, over and over. It's crazy, but I really am thrilled when I see Zac care about something or when I see Aaron control his anger. I rejoice! I don't really know where the phrase came from but it resounds in my head everytime I have one of these moments.
Anyway, I've been thinking of this phrase lately and a new idea has jumped into my little brain this week. I always hear this phrase when I'm most discouraged and then something good happens at school. The more I reflect on it, the more it is being revealed to me that this is not my own voice in my head, it's God's. Maybe everytime I'm discouraged God whispers how proud He is of me and how He rejoices in MY successes. It's a crazy cycle! I find joy in my troubled students when they do good...and my Heavenly Father finds joy in me when I do good and when I see the good in even my most troubled students. Thank you Lord for grace and for finding joy in me despite my many faults.

The Beauty around us

So I'm sitting here trying to think of something to write on my blog and I looked up in great pleasure to see a deer out in the woods behind my house. It is beautiful outside right now, even though it is a very brisk 18 degrees. The snow just looks so perfect on the ground and I love to see the remnants of the snow storm still clinging to the trees. Sometimes my mind gets going so fast all the time that I often miss out on the beauty of moments such as these. There are times that I feel God simply touches my heart and just whispers, "Stop...and look what I have for you. Even as I sit here typing my eyes are opened to the nature outside my window...to the birds playing in the trees and the deer looking for food. It is truly at moments like these when I say to myself and to my heart, "How could you ever doubt His love for you? How could you ever feel so alone? He is all around you...everywhere you look." Thank you, Lord for opening up my eyes.

Woohoo!

Hot Dog! I figured it out! Now I have a profile picture...I'm no longer blank!

I just want a flipping picture!

I'm trying to put a picture on my profile but it seems I have to go through a whole string of events to do so. Hold on, let me see if I can do it...